| David Spade: |
|
... I'm a gentleman and I was always taught it's rude, to talk about a woman's age or weight unless you are breaking up with her ... |
| From The Showbiz Show with David Spade |
| |
| Also See: Break Up Quotes Talk Show Quotes |
|
| Gary Busey (Drake Sabitch): |
|
... I can splatter your cortex or explode your heart, which sounds quicker to you? |
| David Spade (Steve Dodds): |
|
... huh, that's a toughy ... |
| From Black Sheep |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes Scary Quotes |
|
| Chris Farley (Mike Donnelly): |
|
... we got to watch it ... |
| David Spade (Steve Dodds): |
|
... what are we going to do, hook a hanger up to the metal plate in your head? |
| From Black Sheep |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... uh, I can hear you getting fatter ... |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Steve Dodds): |
|
... how could you have such horrible insticts and have survived so long? |
| From Black Sheep |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade: |
|
... MySpace is a great way to keep in touch with friends who you don't care enough about to actually have a conversation with, why bother calling to say "how are you," when you can just surf their page and post an mpeg of a guy farting on his cat ... |
| From The Showbiz Show with David Spade |
| |
| Also See: Friendship Quotes MySpace Quotes Talk Show Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... hi, I'm Earth, have we met? |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Steve Dodds): |
|
... are you or are you not the Black Angel of Death? |
| Chris Farley (Mike Donnelly): |
|
... without question ... |
| David Spade: |
|
... don't agree with me, just pisses me off more ... |
| From Black Sheep |
| |
| Also See: Death Quotes Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... Sir, I need your John Hancock here ... |
| Chris Farley (Tommy): |
|
... John handcock, it is Herbie Hancock ... |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Steve Dodds): |
|
... the war is over, you can punch out now, ah, move on, let it go ... |
| Gary Busey (Drake Sabitch): |
|
... who told you that? |
| David Spade: |
|
... Charlie, um, I just talked to Charlie, and he is not mad at you anymore, so, lets call off operation one of us is crazy and go our separate ways ... |
| From Black Sheep |
| |
| Also See: Crazy Quotes Movie Quotes |
|
| Howard Stern: |
|
... [lose] another 15lbs, you [Robin Quivers] can get knocked up by David Spade ... |
| From Howard Stern Show on January 17, 2008
|
| |
| Also See: Robin Quivers Quotes Sex Quotes Talk Show Quotes |
|
| Thomas Mitchell (Bantam Draper): |
|
... America's greatest president ... |
| David Spade (Rand): |
|
... it's me Rand, open up ... |
| Thomas Mitchell: |
|
... America's greatest president ... |
| David Spade: |
|
... damnit, who is Ronald Reagan ... |
| Thomas Mitchell: |
|
... a casual shoe for yachting ... |
| David Spade: |
|
... what are you trying to figure BD, who could I be ... what is a bluker ... |
| Thomas Mitchell: |
|
... who killed Jesus Christ ... |
| David Spade: |
|
... who are the Jews, open up sucko ... |
| From PCU |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes Ronald Reagan Quotes Sports Quotes Yachting Quotes |
|
| Chris Farley (Tommy): |
|
... where are we going to take the deer? |
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... I don't know, the vet? |
| Chris Farley: |
|
... you take dead animals to the vet? |
| David Spade: |
|
... why not, we take you to the vet ... |
| Chris Farley: |
|
... yeah, I'll take you to the ... |
| David Spade: |
|
... got that? |
| Chris Farley: |
|
... shut up ... |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Death Quotes Doctor Quotes Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade: |
|
... Donald Trump celebrated a birthday last week, when asked how it feels to be 61, Trump said, "Rosie's a fat loser ... she's ugly on the inside" ... |
| From The Showbiz Show with David Spade |
| |
| Also See: Birthday Quotes Talk Show Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Steve Dodds): |
|
... you ok? |
| Chris Farley (Mike Donnelly): |
|
... I'm just dandy, I got a bowl of chocolate pudding in my underpants ... |
| David Spade: |
|
... we didn't have any chocolate puding in there buddy ... |
| From Black Sheep |
| |
| Also See: Food Quotes Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Steve Dodds): |
|
... this is great, I've never won 3 games in a row, I I hardly ever play checkers ... |
| Chris Farley (Mike Donnelly): |
|
... yeah yeah, well, ah, you know its a kinda easy to win when you, ah, NEVER MOVE YOUR BACK ROW, EVER, GOD ... come on ... |
| From Black Sheep |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
ok folks, the guy in front of you is Tommy, he'll be taking you through my little shpeel here, Tommy is a Scorpio and he likes hiking and he has never been laid ... exits ... ok there is one back here and there is probably one over by the wing, somewhere, usually ... and what about seat belts, to fasten, take the little end and stick it in the big end and ... hey you know what, if you guys don't know how to use a seat belt, just ring your call button and Tommy
will come back there and hit you on the head with a tack hammer 'cause you're a retard ...
ok, and life preservers, these we may need ... although what are the odds of us actually hitting a lake,
my money says if anything its gonna be a mountain ... |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| Kate Walsh: |
|
... it's a typical top ten, so you're selling magazines, that's fine, sluts sells, I get it ... |
| David Spade: |
|
... well, I don't know if they are all sluts ... |
| Kate Walsh: |
|
... you know, shut it ... |
| From The Showbiz Show with David Spade |
| |
| Also See: Talk Show Quotes |
|
| Chris Farley (Tommy): |
|
... hey, this suit make me look fat? |
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... no no no, your face does ... |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| Kate Walsh: |
|
... men stare at our boobs, Dave ... |
| David Spade: |
|
... yeah, and that's um, bad? ... that's bad, that's uncool ... |
| From The Showbiz Show with David Spade |
| |
| Also See: Talk Show Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... now I know you'd love to just sit there and keep being not slim, but we got to work a little today, ok? |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... I think your brain has a thick candy shell ... |
| Chris Farley (Tommy): |
|
... your, your brain has the shell on it ... |
| David Spade: |
|
... are you talking? |
| Chris Farley: |
|
... shut up Richard ... |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Food Quotes Movie Quotes |
|
| Chris Farley (Tommy): |
|
... Richard, check out my new office ... |
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... you have a window, and why shouldn't you, you have been here 10 minutes ... |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... its called reading, top to bottom, left to right, group words together as a sentence, take tylenol for any headaches, midol for any cramps ... |
| Chris Farley (Tommy): |
|
... shut up ... |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Rand): |
|
... hi, well well, I see we have a new pledge, Mayflower material I presume? |
| Chris Young (Tom): |
|
... huh? |
| David Spade: |
|
... It's a boat, your ancestors obviously didn't come over on it, but hey its the 90s, we'll take whatever we can get ... |
| From PCU |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... maybe, I guess you should have called ... |
| Chris Farley (Tommy): |
|
... I did call, earlier, when, using the phone ... |
| David Spade: |
|
... earlier, when was that? |
| Chris Farley: |
|
... or later, when, then, I left a message ... |
| David Spade: |
|
... a message, what number did you call? |
| Chris Farley: |
|
... 2, 4, 9er, 5, 6, 7, 8 ... |
| David Spade: |
|
... I can't hear you, you are trailing off and did I catch a 9er in there, were you calling from a walkie talkie? |
| Chris Farley: |
|
... no, it was a cordless ... |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| David Spade: |
|
... this guys is a combination of Leatherface, Chucky, and Jan Brady ... |
| From Black Sheep |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| Chris Farley (Tommy): |
|
... I'll tell you what, you can take a good look at a butcher's a** by sticking your head up there, but wouldn't you rather take his word for it? |
| Auto Store Manager: |
|
... what, I am having trouble making the connection here ... |
| Chris Farley: |
|
... no, I mean you can take a good look at a t-bone by sticking your head up a butcher's a**, but then ... no, it's got to be your bull ... |
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... wow ... |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| Chris Farley: |
|
... what was that? |
| David Spade: |
|
... a chunk in the road ... |
| Chris Farley: |
|
... I just chunked in my pants ... |
| From Black Sheep |
| |
| Also See: Movie Quotes |
|
| Chris Farley (Tommy): |
|
... did you hear I finally graduated? |
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... yeah, just a shade under a decade too, all right ... |
| Chris Farley (Tommy): |
|
... you know a lot of people go to college for 7 years ... |
| David Spade (Richard): |
|
... I know, they're called doctors ... |
| From Tommy Boy |
| |
| Also See: Doctor Quotes Graduation Quotes Movie Quotes |
