| Steven Wright (Boyd Crossman): |
|
... hello Jack ... |
| Alex Désert (Jake Malinak): |
|
... Jake, my name is Jake, we go through this every time ... |
| Steven Wright: |
|
... oh, that's a relief, I thought it was the same time over and over again ... |
| From Becker |
|
| Ted Danson (Dr. John Becker): |
|
... have you ever seen a psychiatrist? |
| Steven Wright (Boyd Crossman): |
|
... well, it's hard to say, it's not like they walk around with big signs all day ... |
| From Becker |
| |
| Also See: Doctor Quotes |
|
| Steven Wright: |
|
... I have a large sea shell collection that I keep scattered on the beaches all over the world ... maybe you've seen it ... |
| From SNL (Saturday Night Live) |
|
| Terry Farrell (Reggi): |
|
... hey Boyd, haven't seen you in a while ... |
| Steven Wright (Boyd Crossman): |
|
... but you can see me now, right? |
| Terry Farrell: |
|
... yeah ... |
| Steven Wright: |
|
... good ... |
| From Becker |
|
| Ted Danson (Dr. John Becker): |
|
... what about drugs, are you on any narcotics or hallucinogens? |
| Steven Wright (Boyd Crossman): |
|
... no, but if you think it would help ... |
| From Becker |
| |
| Also See: Drug Quotes |
|
| Ted Danson (Dr. John Becker): |
|
... I happen to know one [a psychiatrist] and ah, I'm gonna give him a call, I think it will be very helpful for you to talk to him ... |
| Steven Wright (Boyd Crossman): |
|
... well, I'll do what I can, but frankly I have problems of my own ... |
| From Becker |
| |
| Also See: Doctor Quotes |
|
| Steven Wright: |
|
... right now I am having amnesia and deja vu at the same time ... |
| From SNL (Saturday Night Live) |
|
| Steven Wright: |
|
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place. |
| From The Tonight Show on September 14, 1983
|
| |
| Also See: Talk Show Quotes |
|
| Steven Wright: |
|
... I bought some powdered water but I don't know what to add ... |
| From SNL (Saturday Night Live) |
|
| Steven Wright: |
|
... lot of people are afraid of heights, not me, I am afraid of widths ... |
| From SNL (Saturday Night Live) |
|
| Steven Wright: |
|
... I spilled spot remover on my dog and now he is gone ... |
| From SNL (Saturday Night Live) |
|
| Steven Wright: |
|
... I put instant coffee into a microwave and I almost went back in time ... |
| From SNL (Saturday Night Live) |
|
| Steven Wright: |
|
... I like to reminisce with people I don't know ... |
| From SNL (Saturday Night Live) |
|
| Steven Wright: |
|
... I bought some batteries but they weren't included, so I had to buy them again ... |
| From SNL (Saturday Night Live) |
|
| Steven Wright: |
|
... if you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer? |
| From Unknown |
|
| Steven Wright: |
|
... I was walking through the forest and a tree fell right in front of me and I didn't hear it ... |
| From Unknown |
